Feel free to be F1RST!

This post may not be computer related, but it sure as heck is humor related.

Instead of reading up on some Data and Network Communication I’ve been YouTubing.  In the end, I ended up on the video embedded below, and I thought it would be appropriate to post it on a blog –since it’s kind of a blog topic.

Press play. Thank me later.

Road Trippin’

2:15pm – Saturday May 17, 2008

If you haven’t noticed I spent a week in Washington D.C. visiting my brother. It was one of those rare occasions where I get to relax, hang out with my brother and his girlfriend, and not worry about work or school. Sadly all that is good has to come to an end.

As I am typing this I am in my uncle’s car (keep reading why it’s my uncle’s car,) somewhat awkwardly position in the backseat, holding on for dear life. Well, I might be exaggerating a little, but I assure you that I am holding on!

This whole road trip began when my brother and uncle had this brilliant idea to buy a car. A car that is in D.C.. The problem is that I, as does my uncle, live in Louisville – Kentucky. No problem. I can go out to D.C. with my brother, in his girlfriend’s car, and then for the ride back we’ll take the new newly acquired car.

Fail.

The car might be new to my uncle, but there’s nothing new about it. He paid $300 for it. That right there should tell you everything. I yet have to see a car for $300 that can make the trip from D.C. to Louisville. That’s 600 miles I believe. So at 60mp/h it should take us around 10 hours of driving. The car, as you assumed by now, doesn’t exactly work. It’s a 1984 (it’s older than me!) Volkswagen Rabbit GTI. You know one of those rare cars. It’s so rare that even junkyards can’t find them. Anyway, even before my uncle leaves for D.C. my brother informs him that the car won’t stay on. Something is wrong with it. Imagine that. Besides being broken, it’s dirty. The rear driver window is a puzzle, and there’s mold on the seats.

Yeah, very rare indeed.

You’d think at this point my uncle would say, “Just sell it.” I wish.

This Idea wouldn’t have been half bad if my uncle had a truck, or some kind of car with a high output engine and preferable four wheel drive. However, the problem is that he doesn’t. He does have two Jettas though. One of them is my cousin’s car, a ’98 Jetta. The other one is his, a ’89 Jetta. Now you can imagine my cousin needs her car, so no way in hell is she giving that up. No biggy. He’s got old faithful. What could possibly go wrong?

———————————————

4:24pm Saturday May 17, 2008

Everything.

All seemed well at first. We were 60 miles outside of D.C., surprisingly the Jetta was able to pull us, the rust bucket, and itself at 65mph. However, like every automobile the Jetta needs that thing called gas. We pull in, pump up, snack up, ready up, and get ready for the road. As my uncle is turning to pull out hear this sudden sound, kind of like SNAP (imagine that)! Oh you guessed it, the tow bar snapped. It broke. It gave up on life. This is where the real adventure starts.

There we were in the middle of nowhere 70 miles outside of D.C. 530 miles away from home, with a broken tow bar. Not much fun. Good thing we were stranded on a gas station right? They know where shit is? Wrong. I asked if they knew of any hardware stores where we could find another tow bar. Nope. Closest one was another 40 miles away. Pretty close I have to say. So I pick up the yellow pages to call the tool store and ask if they have a tow bar. You know, so we don’t drive there only to find out they don’t.

Ring Ring Ring

Me: Hi, do you guys have a tow bar?

Lady: A what?!

Me: A tow bar.

Lady: No, bye.

Friendly people I have to say. Don’t get me wrong the ladies at the gas station were really nice, but as you can tell the woman that answered at the car parts store was a complete beeotch.

Well after two hours of trying to figure out what to do my uncle decides to ask the next door McDonald’s to leave the car in their parking lot till next week, since it’s a huge parking lot and all. And guess what? They said “no problem.” Thank god. So to make a long story short. We left the car at a random McDonald’s somewhere in the United States (we have their phone number and all) and continued on our 530 mile long trip.

Nothing exciting happened throughout the trip. I was home at 2am, and that’s about it.

Awesome trip.

Chris Matthews brings down the house

If you look up the meaning of idiot in the dictionary you’ll find Kevin Jame under it.  But just ignore it for the sake of laughter. It’ll all make sense once you’ve watched the video.

This will be a rather short post. Not much to write about, actually nothing to write about, just watch it.

Click play. Sit back. And hope you don’t die of laughter.

I nearly died. I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. It was a close call, too close.

Warning. If you experience fatal laughter during the viewing I will take no responsibility for your death.

Watch at own risk.

He ENERGIZED and LEGITIMIZED

He was an appeaser!

Good Laugh…

Summary of 99% of the people you will meet in College | AskStudent

Stumbled across this while surfing the web (I do that a lot.) This is seriously hilarious, it’s a bit long, but it’s a must read for good laughs.

Just do it.

C’mon do it.

Do it.

You heard me.

Do it.

Thank me later

Are you Leet enough?

Recently (meaning about 4 months ago) I was surfing the magical web, when I stumbled across as an awesomely hilarious site. It made me laugh so hard that my diaper had to be changed. Yes people, I wear adult diapers, why? Well because when you are killing owning some nooblings in COD4 you don’t have time to take a break and take shit, it’s gotta happen right there and then.

If you the last paragraph and thought I was being serious, then I can comfortably say that you are a complete failure. No, I don’t wear diapers; the only adults that have the right to wear an adult diaper are astronauts, just because they ride on thousands of pounds of rocket fuel. I don’t care how much of a bad ass you are, when you ride on a rocket you’ll shit your pants whenever someone says: “Houston we have a problem.”

Anyway, enough drifting off topic, back to the hilariousness of the magical site. This site may not appear hilarious to some (if you fall under the group of some then you lead a pitiful life), to truly appreciate it you’d have to play Valve’s Portal, and be familiar with Counter Strike: Source. Anyway, this site makes machinima using the steam engine and some other magical things (like fairy dust). I can safely say the production quality better than some most Hollywood movies made recently. (In the name of the king, Wtf Hollywood!?)

As mentioned earlier, I stumped across this site on accident, I don’t remember exactly how, but that doesn’t matter, all that matters is that it’s hilarious. When I watched the videos I couldn’t help myself but laugh at all the references, I guess it’s not funny if you haven’t really played Counter Strike: Source. You’d have to be familiar with the CS:S community to understand some of the jokes, on the other hand, you don’t really have to. It’s hilarious without knowing any references. Just sit on a toilet for your own safety (take my word for it.)

As of now I am waiting for episode 12 to air; 11 left me on the edge of my bed (I watch the episodes before I go sleep). Anyway, even if you haven’t got the slightest clue what I am talking about, do stop by the site and check it out. I recently saw that laughing adds 8 years to your life, so go, laugh a little and live a lot longer.

Anyway without further a due, here are some links you HAVE to click.

The Leet World Episodes: Click me!

Must Watch Short Movie: Click Thy!